I‘ve heard the following statement a lot, “Your great but, I’m just not ready for a relationship right now. I mean I’d like to keep hanging out because you’re a cool chick, but it’s up to you.” I respond with an, F You, and punch him in the face…okay maybe not, but I thought about it. After my overly dramatic response subsides I can never decide what I am most disappointed in, 1) He couldn’t have come up with a less stereotypical way to dump me, or 2) This is happening again.
Why is it that men are so scared of the “R” word?
The saying, “You can’t have your cake and eat it to” doesn’t seem to apply to most men. They want to be friends, have sex, and be able to date around. It is a well known fact that woman get emotionally attached after sex. Giving it up to an emotionally unavailable man is not something a self respecting intellectual female would do. Which means in order for him to eat that cake he has to feed you all the sweet things you wants to hear, “You’re beautiful”, “You’re different than other girls” and so on. Then before you know it you two are going to movies, hanging out multiple times a week and having mind blowing sex. For most women this means all lights are a GO! You find yourself happy. Maybe you don’t know where things are going, but you just enjoy his company and that priceless feeling that someone understands you. Then there goes your guard. Your guard is so low you couldn’t trip over it while walking blindfolded down the street .
To make a clear point I have a scenario for you ladies. Say you are in the above mentioned relationship. OH excuse me I mean the “R” word, don‘t want to scare you away now. So pictures this, time goes by. Your feeling pretty good about yourself and this re……ship. Then you find out homeboy is going to a concert with another woman. He, of course, reassures you it’s not a date they’re just friends. He must of forgot who he was talking to because your not an…idiot. So after doing the adult thing and effectively communicating about this quandary, he nonchalantly hands you, “Well we’re not together so I’m going to do whatever I want”. Obviously this man is selfish and you deserve better, but for arguments sake lets keep going. How do you handle this? What do you say? You were so incredibly happy one minute then your hopes were trampled on like an ant hill discovered by a little boy who is just having a good ol’ time.
Here is where men and woman appear to be different. For the woman nothing would have changed. A title. That was all she was hoping for. For the man his entire independent life would have been ripped away. She was about to clamp on the shackles and tie him to his Lazy Boy for life. And they say women are over dramatic. Why are men so afraid that monogamy and monotony are the same word?
Monday, August 29, 2011
Friday, August 26, 2011
Weekend Music Send Off
Happy Friday Ladies,
Every Friday I will post a video that will pump you up for the weekend. I will usually pick artists that have a strong, sensual, unique, female voice. Music that make you feel not only sexy, but like you can go into the weekend and be in control of how you navigate the water of attraction.
This weekend's video is Indestructible by Robyn. At first people respond to the physical nature of the video, but look past it and dig deeper. Download it, throw it on your ipod, give your speakers some love. It will make you feel...well indestructible and you'll wanna dance!!
Be Smart, Be Safe, Be Yourself!
View music video at this link: http://youtu.be/ofbiKzpPPFg
Indestructible by robyn
Every Friday I will post a video that will pump you up for the weekend. I will usually pick artists that have a strong, sensual, unique, female voice. Music that make you feel not only sexy, but like you can go into the weekend and be in control of how you navigate the water of attraction.
This weekend's video is Indestructible by Robyn. At first people respond to the physical nature of the video, but look past it and dig deeper. Download it, throw it on your ipod, give your speakers some love. It will make you feel...well indestructible and you'll wanna dance!!
Be Smart, Be Safe, Be Yourself!
View music video at this link: http://youtu.be/ofbiKzpPPFg
Indestructible by robyn
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Welcome!
Welcome to the first posting of, "He Said What?". My name is Karen and I am a 27 year old female who, I’m proud to say, has her life together. I have a great job that I love, friends that are fun and reliable, and the most stable family unit anyone could ask for. So what could possibly be missing from this equation of virtue and my stereotypical answer is: A MAN. That’s right a good ol’ fashion supportive, fun loving, and responsible figure that is not A) related to me or B) a girlfriend.
I have a group of friends ranging from ages 23 to 31. They are all successful, vibrant, and beautiful women. So why are they all single? For the past 2 years I have been watching my friends date and one thing remains stead fast: No matter who the guy, where you meet them, what their age or ethnicity they all seem to be the same: Eternal Bachelors. How many times have you heard a guy say, “Your great, but I’m just not ready for a relationship”? Excuse me sir, I asked if you would drop me off at the airport, not marry me.
There are a lot of self-help books for woman. My all time favorite was, “Why Men Love Bitches”. Until my cousin, male of course, quizzically stated, “ So it’s a book that teaches you how to be an independent woman, but the end game is to land a man?”…damn, he's always right! I have to admit though the book is still a guilty please of mine. If you want to feel empowered I suggest it. So I got to thinking since these Self Help book aren’t really useful and Sex And The City is only useful up to a point (God knows it’s my dating bible) where else besides my girlfriends can I find woman just like me. Woman who find themselves in the same predicament over and over. These days dating feels like being able to swim in the shallow water, but when thrown into the deep end all you can do is tread water until someone throws you a life raft…not fun!
SO here is what I want to do. I want a blog where friends can post and chat about the single life and the stages of a relationship from a woman‘s point of view. A place where you can ask a question and get answers from all different types of free thinking intelligent women. I will put a structure to it so that it’s not just a mess of opinions. Every week a new question.
This is not a blog to bash the male sex. Lord knows we love 'em. It's also not to emote about how hard it is to be single, because it's only as hard as you make it. Personally I LOVE being single. When your on your own you learn so much about who you are and what you can do. If you don't know these things then, in my opinion, you are not ready for a relationship. This is a place for advice that you may or may not want to hear, so be careful what you ask! We are not doctors or therapists and we could be wrong, BUT we are here for each other and that's what matters. I hope that you will enjoy this bog and that you find solace in knowing you are not alone in this crazy dating jungle.
Please email me with any new questions or topics you want to discuss and I will post them as a subject to converse about every week: k.bombardier84@gmail.com
Feel free to share this with your friends so that we can create a diverse community.
I have a group of friends ranging from ages 23 to 31. They are all successful, vibrant, and beautiful women. So why are they all single? For the past 2 years I have been watching my friends date and one thing remains stead fast: No matter who the guy, where you meet them, what their age or ethnicity they all seem to be the same: Eternal Bachelors. How many times have you heard a guy say, “Your great, but I’m just not ready for a relationship”? Excuse me sir, I asked if you would drop me off at the airport, not marry me.
There are a lot of self-help books for woman. My all time favorite was, “Why Men Love Bitches”. Until my cousin, male of course, quizzically stated, “ So it’s a book that teaches you how to be an independent woman, but the end game is to land a man?”…damn, he's always right! I have to admit though the book is still a guilty please of mine. If you want to feel empowered I suggest it. So I got to thinking since these Self Help book aren’t really useful and Sex And The City is only useful up to a point (God knows it’s my dating bible) where else besides my girlfriends can I find woman just like me. Woman who find themselves in the same predicament over and over. These days dating feels like being able to swim in the shallow water, but when thrown into the deep end all you can do is tread water until someone throws you a life raft…not fun!
SO here is what I want to do. I want a blog where friends can post and chat about the single life and the stages of a relationship from a woman‘s point of view. A place where you can ask a question and get answers from all different types of free thinking intelligent women. I will put a structure to it so that it’s not just a mess of opinions. Every week a new question.
This is not a blog to bash the male sex. Lord knows we love 'em. It's also not to emote about how hard it is to be single, because it's only as hard as you make it. Personally I LOVE being single. When your on your own you learn so much about who you are and what you can do. If you don't know these things then, in my opinion, you are not ready for a relationship. This is a place for advice that you may or may not want to hear, so be careful what you ask! We are not doctors or therapists and we could be wrong, BUT we are here for each other and that's what matters. I hope that you will enjoy this bog and that you find solace in knowing you are not alone in this crazy dating jungle.
Please email me with any new questions or topics you want to discuss and I will post them as a subject to converse about every week: k.bombardier84@gmail.com
Feel free to share this with your friends so that we can create a diverse community.
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