You Can Grow Flowers From Dirt

It’s pretty clear that when looking at my dating history a prerequisite to getting my attention are flashing red lights that read “Emotional Black Hole: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DATE”. Yep for me and many woman alike that means, Eugh I’m bored why not. So it really shouldn’t be any surprise when I or as I tell myself, we, end up wondering what went wrong. I have noticed the guys that have this emotional unavailability have usually been royally screwed over by, as they say A Bitch. So I often wonder how do these guys get so emotionally attached to a woman that is such a…well you know? I mean really do these girls start out coy and sexy then turn up the heat on the disaster meter. What makes guys stick around and fight for someone who treats them like crap? In my highly scientist study of the male species I notice they are messed up over the worst sounding women. I mean so messed up I say, “ Wow these seems like fresh raw emotion when did you break up?” He replies, “ 4 years ago” COME ON BUDDY! Really? Get over it. This seems to be something I hear a lot especially since those are the types of guys I welcome into my life. So then I play out the scenario in my head of what it would be like to be one of these girls. And all I can think is when does it go from being coy and sexy to cold and undesirable? Every woman has there down fall of a type, since becoming single about 3 years ago now I believe I go for these types of men because I am also in emotional dating limbo. Every time I get close to having a relationship I convince myself new guy doesn’t compare to (Insert emotional hang up guy name here). Side note I really think the downside of being super wrapped up in plot lines from shows like Sex And The City is false hope because Ladies, Mr. Big is fictional, in real life we still wouldn’t know his name was John. Anyways one of my really awesome good friends told me recently: Maybe you get hung up on so and so because you’re not ready. When you’re ready whom ever will come along and you won’t look back. She also said that all the dating disappoints are a foundation for what you really want. You take a little from this guy and a little from the next until you have enough to know what you really want and then when he comes along you have bits and pieces that make a whole. I found comfort in that. BUT I’m still perplexed at the amount of time it takes for men to get over women who were not good to them! This is Kate Nash’s Merry Happy. I love it because any song that sounds happy, but is sarcastic will always make me smile. Plus I love the line, “But I know we are not the people that we turned out to be”.